Seriously Now, I'm TOTALLY Crazy
You all know just how crazy and wild I am in real life, how I'm usually down for just about anything. Well, on Friday night I was a little aggravated that most of my friends in Spokane weren't able to meet up/hangout/see me when I had days available to spend time with them. So like the proactive person I am, I get on Craigslist and start browsing the Strictly Platonic section, hoping to find any interesting individuals that might seem like they can put up with safe insanity.
No such luck. So I got more annoyed and decided to post an ad myself. Behold my masterpiece!!!
Wow. You actually opened my posting. So you've obviously read the disclaimer (meaning the title) and are now either continuing to read because your life is in mortal peril or because you're just bored out of your mind at 2:30 in the freaking MORNING. If it's the former, I do apologize for your predicament, just know that I cannot help, as I will most likely just encourage you to do something reckless/irresponsible/not entirely healthy for your physical or mental well-being. But if you are continuing to read this due to your otherwise lack of other entertainment, don't go telling people I dragged you down the rabbit hole with me!!
Okay, if you really did not get the Alice in Wonderland reference, then you should stop reading this. Right now. That's kids' stuff, man. And if you don't get that, then there is no way in Heaven, Hell, or Purgatory (if you believe in that kind of shit, that is. Oh crap, I'm probably going straight to Hades for that kind of blasphemy....) that we are going to get along. What am I saying?? We'd probably get along, as long as I have a REALLY strong drink in my hand :)
So here's my schpeel....is that even how you SPELL that word? I always thought it should be sh-peel. Cuz, you know, that's how it's pronounced....anyways, WAAAYYY off topic.
......
Here I am, it's 10:50 at night, you're reading this at whatever time you are, and I am eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with bananas and Ritz crackers. So just get that mental image firmly in place. Got it? Good.
I moved back to Spokane two weeks ago. I work at Walmart, and I rock the freaking socks off at what I do. Except I can't seem to get my friends to come over and hang out, which has gotten really annoying and made me a little stir crazy. Hence why I'm on CL and not doing something productive with what little alone time I do have. Oh, and I say that because I have a 3 year old daughter. Love her to death, but she's just like a mini-me, which makes her a complete monster. She's with her dad this weekend. And I'm going crazy because she's not around to give me a reason to be crazy.
So. If you've gotten this far with my ramblings, then I feel I can safely assume that you're slightly intrigued and think you can still hold onto your marbles if we should ever meet....or you just think I'm super hot and you can handle having a hot friend even if she is a little (or a SHIT TON!!!) crazy.
Either way, you've been warned. And honestly, I'm for real. I would give you my Facebook shit, my digits, or whatevs, but seriously, you're going to read through this whole post and then I have to PROVE that I'm legitimately breathing?? In that case, no, I'm not alive. I'm just the most rocking hot zombie chick you will ever meet.
But please, be in Spokane or within twenty miles of the city limits. Cuz otherwise you're just going to be one of those creepers who will start following me around at work, and I've already kicked two of your asses this year.
Now let's see how long this will stay up until CL takes it down or it's reported!!
It's 11:01 pm on 5/30/2012.....GO!!!
I tell you what, its been interesting. Especially when I've been called a meglomaniac of the African American gene pool (not in so many nice words, of course). But so far, one rampantly overstimulated person (who goes by the name "Matthew." My apologies to the amazing men out there with that name. I know you are not all such neanderthals) that believes there is some sort of topic worth debating in my post. Shocked the hell out of me, ya know? Who knew that admitting I was unique was worth debating?
No such luck. So I got more annoyed and decided to post an ad myself. Behold my masterpiece!!!
Wow. You actually opened my posting. So you've obviously read the disclaimer (meaning the title) and are now either continuing to read because your life is in mortal peril or because you're just bored out of your mind at 2:30 in the freaking MORNING. If it's the former, I do apologize for your predicament, just know that I cannot help, as I will most likely just encourage you to do something reckless/irresponsible/not entirely healthy for your physical or mental well-being. But if you are continuing to read this due to your otherwise lack of other entertainment, don't go telling people I dragged you down the rabbit hole with me!!
Okay, if you really did not get the Alice in Wonderland reference, then you should stop reading this. Right now. That's kids' stuff, man. And if you don't get that, then there is no way in Heaven, Hell, or Purgatory (if you believe in that kind of shit, that is. Oh crap, I'm probably going straight to Hades for that kind of blasphemy....) that we are going to get along. What am I saying?? We'd probably get along, as long as I have a REALLY strong drink in my hand :)
So here's my schpeel....is that even how you SPELL that word? I always thought it should be sh-peel. Cuz, you know, that's how it's pronounced....anyways, WAAAYYY off topic.
......
Here I am, it's 10:50 at night, you're reading this at whatever time you are, and I am eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with bananas and Ritz crackers. So just get that mental image firmly in place. Got it? Good.
I moved back to Spokane two weeks ago. I work at Walmart, and I rock the freaking socks off at what I do. Except I can't seem to get my friends to come over and hang out, which has gotten really annoying and made me a little stir crazy. Hence why I'm on CL and not doing something productive with what little alone time I do have. Oh, and I say that because I have a 3 year old daughter. Love her to death, but she's just like a mini-me, which makes her a complete monster. She's with her dad this weekend. And I'm going crazy because she's not around to give me a reason to be crazy.
So. If you've gotten this far with my ramblings, then I feel I can safely assume that you're slightly intrigued and think you can still hold onto your marbles if we should ever meet....or you just think I'm super hot and you can handle having a hot friend even if she is a little (or a SHIT TON!!!) crazy.
Either way, you've been warned. And honestly, I'm for real. I would give you my Facebook shit, my digits, or whatevs, but seriously, you're going to read through this whole post and then I have to PROVE that I'm legitimately breathing?? In that case, no, I'm not alive. I'm just the most rocking hot zombie chick you will ever meet.
But please, be in Spokane or within twenty miles of the city limits. Cuz otherwise you're just going to be one of those creepers who will start following me around at work, and I've already kicked two of your asses this year.
Now let's see how long this will stay up until CL takes it down or it's reported!!
It's 11:01 pm on 5/30/2012.....GO!!!
I tell you what, its been interesting. Especially when I've been called a meglomaniac of the African American gene pool (not in so many nice words, of course). But so far, one rampantly overstimulated person (who goes by the name "Matthew." My apologies to the amazing men out there with that name. I know you are not all such neanderthals) that believes there is some sort of topic worth debating in my post. Shocked the hell out of me, ya know? Who knew that admitting I was unique was worth debating?
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