let's get NAKED
a few years ago, i had a friend tell me the most profound thing about sex, vulnerability, and my own body.
"if you can't laugh with someone while you're naked, there's no point to it."
and right now, i couldn't agree more. well, in my current relationship, i couldn't agree more. my whole life, i've struggled with being compassionate to my own self, with not nit picking at my own imperfections and comparing myself to others. it's a toxic habit, and it's been a struggle.
the other night, my future husband and i had a roll out, "let's be weird," laugh until our sides hurt, wrestling match. in our birthday suits (because neither of us really like clothes a whole lot, and it was bed time!). and getting up this morning, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror, just in my underwear, i couldn't help but admire the woman that my fiance has fallen in love with. and i fell in love with her a little bit more, too.
sure, i still compare myself to other people. there's no point in denying that. and yeah, i feel like there are always places or things about me that i can improve upon, but that's the beautiful thing about who i am, and this stage that i find myself in. i'm willing to see my failings, and i'm willing to change, and i have an INCREDIBLE partner that i can be vulnerable and naked and unabashedly wild with.
but the most valuable thing about having someone i can be so vulnerable with....it's knowing that there is no judgement. it's knowing that i can come across something on social media that will make me sad, or i will see someone venting about something that i have or am currently struggling with, and i'll respond but get so upset and start to cry over something so seemingly insignificant, and yet when he senses me (because he's not always in the same building, house, or even room and yet he can tell) spiraling, all he has to do is say something small, like "everything okay?" or "i miss you already." and immediately, i'll be able to break down, and ask for a hug, or a cuddle, or some kind of physical reassurance, and he will be there with it. j
no talking until i'm ready, no pressure to move until i'm ready, and he's just there. stoic. strong. consistent. and when you get naked with someone, that's what you need.
so when i say that i want to be naked with JUST HIM, and i can't imagine my life with anyone else, it's because he is that anchor for me. he's the roots that have helped me find a home. he's the only one i want to be naked with.
even if he does lick my ear while we are watching movies in bed.
"if you can't laugh with someone while you're naked, there's no point to it."
and right now, i couldn't agree more. well, in my current relationship, i couldn't agree more. my whole life, i've struggled with being compassionate to my own self, with not nit picking at my own imperfections and comparing myself to others. it's a toxic habit, and it's been a struggle.
the other night, my future husband and i had a roll out, "let's be weird," laugh until our sides hurt, wrestling match. in our birthday suits (because neither of us really like clothes a whole lot, and it was bed time!). and getting up this morning, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror, just in my underwear, i couldn't help but admire the woman that my fiance has fallen in love with. and i fell in love with her a little bit more, too.
sure, i still compare myself to other people. there's no point in denying that. and yeah, i feel like there are always places or things about me that i can improve upon, but that's the beautiful thing about who i am, and this stage that i find myself in. i'm willing to see my failings, and i'm willing to change, and i have an INCREDIBLE partner that i can be vulnerable and naked and unabashedly wild with.
but the most valuable thing about having someone i can be so vulnerable with....it's knowing that there is no judgement. it's knowing that i can come across something on social media that will make me sad, or i will see someone venting about something that i have or am currently struggling with, and i'll respond but get so upset and start to cry over something so seemingly insignificant, and yet when he senses me (because he's not always in the same building, house, or even room and yet he can tell) spiraling, all he has to do is say something small, like "everything okay?" or "i miss you already." and immediately, i'll be able to break down, and ask for a hug, or a cuddle, or some kind of physical reassurance, and he will be there with it. j
no talking until i'm ready, no pressure to move until i'm ready, and he's just there. stoic. strong. consistent. and when you get naked with someone, that's what you need.
so when i say that i want to be naked with JUST HIM, and i can't imagine my life with anyone else, it's because he is that anchor for me. he's the roots that have helped me find a home. he's the only one i want to be naked with.
even if he does lick my ear while we are watching movies in bed.
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