A Matter of Time
A couple of days ago, my significant other and I were on our way to the grocery store with his two kiddos and my little girl when he reached over and grabbed my hand, stating, "We need to pick an anniversary. Because we didn't get to celebrate an anniversary this year, and it makes me a little sad."
For me, it was a moment to just giggle a little. Because we have known each other for so long, and our friends and family have considered us together for a very long time, it can be a bit confusing to just come up with we might call an official anniversary. We threw around dates like when we had our very first date, when we first romantically connected, when he first realized that he had loved me (which was difficult because it was VERY much "hindsight" revelation to him at that time, since we were both involved in other relationships and were trying to save those), when the pregnancy test for our angel baby showed positive, or the day that we both told each other "I love you."
Time is always a funny thing. And sometimes, when things get stressful, and life makes you want to pull your hair out, and money and disagreements between others are just adding to the chaos that you want to call your life, I have to remember to take a moment, to breath, to grab onto my guy and to remember to take the time to snuggle with my daughter and to respond to the "I love you, Evey," that comes from my little ginger step-daughter in the morning after I start getting ready for school and work, or when I come home to all the children getting along (for five minutes until kids start being kids), and then those times when I just want to envelope my guy in the love and adoration and just let him know that no matter how difficult this time may be, it's only a matter of time before it gets better. After all, it was only a matter of time before best friends came back together and started supporting each other in 2016, only a matter of time before he helped me deal with my own demons, only a matter of time before we really start fighting back together against the tides of apathy and bleak possibilities to really see what we can make of this thing called life together. It's only a matter of time before we are able to tell strangers that it's not just his kids and my kid, but it's his, mine, and ours all together.
It's only a matter of time before our kids are grown, and making waves in this world, and we will really miss seeing the oldest sitting down with the younger ones, reading stories from the Bernstein Bears or the Wizard of Oz or any number of books. And it's only going to be a matter of time before they'll be too big, too independent, and they won't want to hold his hand anymore, or my hand anymore, and in those moments it will make me happy for the few snapshots that I get in the little moments, even if it's just walking back to the car after a shopping trip together.
For me, it was a moment to just giggle a little. Because we have known each other for so long, and our friends and family have considered us together for a very long time, it can be a bit confusing to just come up with we might call an official anniversary. We threw around dates like when we had our very first date, when we first romantically connected, when he first realized that he had loved me (which was difficult because it was VERY much "hindsight" revelation to him at that time, since we were both involved in other relationships and were trying to save those), when the pregnancy test for our angel baby showed positive, or the day that we both told each other "I love you."
Time is always a funny thing. And sometimes, when things get stressful, and life makes you want to pull your hair out, and money and disagreements between others are just adding to the chaos that you want to call your life, I have to remember to take a moment, to breath, to grab onto my guy and to remember to take the time to snuggle with my daughter and to respond to the "I love you, Evey," that comes from my little ginger step-daughter in the morning after I start getting ready for school and work, or when I come home to all the children getting along (for five minutes until kids start being kids), and then those times when I just want to envelope my guy in the love and adoration and just let him know that no matter how difficult this time may be, it's only a matter of time before it gets better. After all, it was only a matter of time before best friends came back together and started supporting each other in 2016, only a matter of time before he helped me deal with my own demons, only a matter of time before we really start fighting back together against the tides of apathy and bleak possibilities to really see what we can make of this thing called life together. It's only a matter of time before we are able to tell strangers that it's not just his kids and my kid, but it's his, mine, and ours all together.
It's only a matter of time before our kids are grown, and making waves in this world, and we will really miss seeing the oldest sitting down with the younger ones, reading stories from the Bernstein Bears or the Wizard of Oz or any number of books. And it's only going to be a matter of time before they'll be too big, too independent, and they won't want to hold his hand anymore, or my hand anymore, and in those moments it will make me happy for the few snapshots that I get in the little moments, even if it's just walking back to the car after a shopping trip together.
Comments
Post a Comment